


Out of Sync

by Live



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 17:26:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14573928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Live/pseuds/Live
Summary: It's not the future he wants, but it's all they have.





	Out of Sync

**Author's Note:**

> I apologise in advance for the angst! T^T

Contrary to popular opinion there are in fact a finite number of possible futures. The number of possibilities is admittedly far too vast for the human mind to comprehend, but it is finite. Eventually there are no more choices left to exercise and all anyone can do is play out the best scenario. Things will end. Things will stop. And that’s what Stephen Strange is afraid of.

He’s been looking at every possible outcome for five minutes (336,912,641 minutes) and he was running out of possible futures to see. They had just over a million possible futures left and Stephen was losing hope. They hadn’t won once. 

Whether Stephen fought, whether Stephen ran, whether Stephen hid: Thanos always came for him. Always killed him. Always left with the time stone. 

It wasn’t the only consistency. There were always two other events that unfolded. No matter what. Peter Quill will discover Gamora’s death and grieve in a rather violent and altogether unhelpful manner and Tony Stark will be stabbed. Stephen had seen this happen time and time again. 

(He could pinpoint the exact second Peter Quill’s heart broke. The second it shattered for his fallen lover, only for those shards to fling them self uselessly at Thanos. Only to lose his mind to the unending anger. Only to consume the world in flames.)

(He could never predict when Tony Stark’s flesh would slide away for unwelcome metal. Could never predict what would pierce his flesh; debris? his own suit? Thanos’ entire gauntlet? All he knew was Tony’s eyes. Burning bright. Determined. Sure. A futurist seeing a positive outcome that Stephen couldn’t find. It’s what kept Stephen looking, what gave him hope, even when he saw those eyes dim over and over again.)

He liked Tony. 

It wasn’t ideal. Liking someone that consistently died. But, it was what it was. Positive emotion. Enforced by the millions of lives they’d lived together.

The millions of lives that Stephen had lived alone. 

It could be hard to distinguish the two (Stephen still woke up wondering how Dormammu would kill him this time). It had to be distinguished though. Tony, the Tony Stark standing mere feet from him (arguing with Quill), had no idea what the two of them had shared going forward. Might never know depending on the best outcome. Would never know as much as Stephen. They’d never be on the same wave length.

(Blood paints pale lips. A half limp body splayed across the floor. No red or gold armour in sight- every scrap of Iron man had been throw at Thanos. 

It never did any good. 

Stephen lay next to Tony’s gasping form. He had stayed to fight this time. 

He had lost. 

“Why do you think he left us alive?” Tony had asked Stephen (it was the 306,412th time Tony had asked him that). 

This time there was no Peter Quill to spit. “Because he’s the mad Titan”. No Peter Parker to fret. “You don’t look too good Mr. Stark”. No Mantis to reflect. “He let us live last time as well. He is filled with much sadness”. No Drax to vow. “It is his mistake, he should have killed us when he could have”. No Nebula to grouse. “It is unimportant. All that matters is ending him”. They had all died this time. One of their more disastrous results. There was only Stephen left.

Only Stephen and Tony.

“Why do you think?” Stephen had asked instead of answering. He knew in a few moments his body would be pulled apart molecule by molecule. The infinity gauntlet and its stones destroying the very fabric of reality and time. Thanos hadn’t left them alive.

“Not enough data,” Tony had hummed, his eyes focusing on the sky above (a paler hue than their own precious Earth). 

“And from the limited data you do have?” He had prodded. Intrigued.

“Well... Seems Thanos has some weird honour system,” Tony had theorised. “Some weird kind of respect for others in the universe- no idea what makes him respect others mind you. He just kept monologuing like he knew who I was, and how it would be a shame if I died.”

If he was the Stephen Strange of now, the one who had gone through so many iterations of Tony’s demise, he’d probably assure him it would be a shame for Tony to die. A shame to lose that spark of intelligence and goodness. Instead he apologised as his form started to turn into dust. Thanos destroying everyone. 

As Tony half panicked, half reassured his fading form, Stephen couldn’t help but think it was a shame someone like Tony Stark wasn’t the one trusted with the time stone. The kind of conclusions Tony would make if he was given an eternity to analyse would be impressive.)

(That was probably where the intrigue started.)

Tony Stark was an impressive man. Stephen Strange has known this his whole life. Had seen article upon article of the man. From when he was a child creating impossible machines, to when Stephen had seen him at galas working his crowds to unbearable heights. Tony Stark was smart and charismatic. But, more importantly Tony Stark was good. 

It’s hard to see behind the physical armour infused with enough machinery to end the world. It’s hard to see behind the mental armour that lashed out in sarcastic little bullets. But, Tony Stark cares, he cares so much.

(He saw it when Tony held Peter Parker close, tight, whispering soft, false, reassurances to Peter’s fading form.)

(He saw it when Tony let Thanos rip the infinity gauntlet straight through his chest, no armour left to protect himself, only his physical body trying to obstruct Thanos from Stephen and the time stone.)

(He knew it when Tony confessed about his past. Tony explained why he gave up the weapon business. He explained what happened with the Avengers. Tony never once blamed anyone other than himself. Stephen knew Tony cared too much, knew he was too good. He’d always do what he thought would help out.)

(Maybe that’s why he keeps dying.)

Maybe that’s why he keeps dying.

It’s getting painful (it’s been painful), but Stephen keeps looking. Keeps searching for that one future Tony’s too bright eyes have seen. Keeps searching for the future he’s sure they win.

(He asked him in one future how Tony saw them winning. 

“We have to,” Tony had said. Nothing more. Nothing less. 

Stephen didn’t have time (surprisingly, he never did over the millions of lives he lived) to press the issue. He knew there was more. Tony was a futurist. He had to have some kind of backup plan. He wasn’t one to rely on blind hope.)

Maybe that’s what leads him to this one future (though maybe it’s the way his throat starts to close up, unusable with these oppressive feelings). But, he finds it. A future where they win. A future where he does the unimaginable. 

He hands over the time stone.

Tony’s bright eyes look at his pleadingly. Begging him not to hand it over, to not put him above something so precious. But, he does it. He chooses Tony over the stone, even though he told Tony he wouldn’t (and he wouldn’t have, if he hadn’t already lived millions of lives). 

Peter Quill still grieved through anger. Tony still got stabbed. Thanos still got the time stone. But, it feels different this time. Maybe Stephen’s being optimistic, maybe he’s feeling momentary joy over not having to watch Tony die again. Because, Tony is alive this time. Tony was stabbed, but Thanos stopped soon enough that the damage isn’t unrepairable. 

“Why did you do that?” Tony asks him.

(“I love you,” is what Stephen wants to say. But, it wouldn’t make any sense. Stephen knows more about Tony than Tony could ever imagine. Tony has given Stephen so much, but Tony doesn’t know that. They’re out of sync, they’ll always be out of sync. Tony has no way of experiencing everything that Stephen has and even if he did there’s no guarantee Tony would feel the same.)

(He has Pepper. Stephen had congratulated their engagement. Tony is in a stable and loving relationship.)

“Tony, there was no other way,” Stephen says instead.

He doesn’t know if it’s reassuring to Tony, doesn’t know if he’s trying to reassure him. If there’s any point in reassuring him. Stephen fades to ash. 

Dead again.

His death never ends the vision of the future he sees. His presence goes to the stone. Almost as though the time stone is calling for him. He’ll find himself on a planet, the mad Titan sitting happily, basking in a fake sunlight. The mad Titan won’t be happy to have killed so many, but he’ll be happy to have succeeded in his goal. He thinks he’s watching a better world, a better world that he himself has made. 

That is usually the last thing he sees, before the green stone on Thanos’ gauntlet glows and Stephen is spirited away to another time line. Another possibility. Not this time though. The stone keeps him there. Keeps him with the mad Titan. 

Stephen watches the calm smile stretched across Thanos’ face. 

Something is different this time.

Stephen’s not sure how much time passes, isn’t sure how exactly it happens (his mind picking and choosing what he can comprehend), but Tony appears (with the other Avengers) and he wins. He defeats Thanos. He puts on the infinity gauntlet. And Stephen’s shot away from the stone. Back to his own body. With a panicking Peter and a bunch of confused Guardians. 

They’ve won. 

He thinks the time stone would go back. Let him see the other timelines. Let him see if they win in any other timelines. But, he’s stuck. 

The time stone isn’t letting him go back.

He watches as they go back to Earth. Sees as they process what must have happened to them. Observes as they gather with Earth’s other defenders. Witnesses as his heart breaks.

Tony Stark had died.

Stephen blinks. Finding it hard to comprehend. He had seen Tony alive and standing mere seconds ago, but now-

The stones are nearly impossible to use all at once. Tony had done it, but only long enough to bring everyone back to life and destroy the infinity stones. That’s the last thing Stephen’s told in this timeline. 

He closes his eyes, his disbelief strong, only to open them to Titan. Only a million more futures to toil through. 

It’s not looking good.

Strange tries again. And again. And again. He tries sacrificing the time stone with a warning on the stone’s dangerousness. Tony doesn’t succeed that time. Tries sacrificing the stone and telling Tony of the future where they succeed. Tony doesn’t succeed that time either. 

They’re running out. He’s growing desperate.

(“I love you,” Stephen responds when Tony asks him why. 

He’ll discover in seconds it’s not the right thing to say. Tony will fail this time as well. Maybe his words are too heavy for Tony to bare. Maybe his words are an unwanted blight on Tony’s existence. Stephen doesn’t know what it is all he knows is-

“I love you,” it feels wonderful to say one more time. He thinks the third time would’ve been even better, but it’s taken by the ashes.)

“Strange!” He hears Tony’s voice. Feels his strong hands keeping him from falling. “You’re alright. You’re back.”

Stephen looks up at Tony’s face. At those kind, bright eyes. They’re filled with concern (Tony’s known him less than half a day and he’s already concerned. He’s too kind.)

Stephen explains what he had been doing. He never looks away from Tony as he’s doing so. His heart hurts as it hammers against his ribcage. 

“How many did we win?” Tony asks, and Stephen thinks of a funeral that won’t have a body. Thinks of bright eyes dimming to nothing.

“One.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was meant to be fluff! I was just so happy Strange saved Tony that they kind of jumped up to being my new Marvel OTP (Sorry StarkQuill), and so I wanted to write some cute Strange falling for Tony over all the futures he saw, only my mind kept being like: what if he didn't save Tony?!?! What if the only time line they win has Tony dead at the end?!?! D: And thus THIS horrendous beast was created! I am the worst and I apologise (please don't die in the next film Tony T^T)!
> 
> Anyways hope you enjoyed ~<3


End file.
